Thursday, January 6, 2011

Ode to Being a Bear

… too lazy to blog... ok.. still feeling a bit under the weather… to much stuff going on in life... and I just couldn’t dream up something to write about. I haven’t been able to eat much today because my tummy is still not happy, and I haven’t had much energy for exercise. On top of that, I now have a solid headache. The weather is chilly and I am SO COLD! As this frigid weather lingers, I remembered something received in e-mail a couple of years ago. Sure wish I knew who wrote this little gem. They deserve a Pulitzer!

Every time I read this I smile.

Gonna be a bear

In this life I am a woman. In my next life, I'd like to come back as a bear.

When you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid. I could deal with that too.

When you're a girl bear you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partially grown cute cuddly cubs. I could definitely deal with that.

If you're mama bear everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs.

If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too. I could deal with that.

If you're a bear, your mate expects you to wake up growling. He expects that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yup! Gonna be a bear.

LOL. That always makes me smile. Come to think of it… I just may be a bear.

My name is Mama Bear. I'm married to Papa Bear. We have 5 growing cubs (1 now grown and moving off to her own den) and we live in a cozy 4 bedroom 2 bath cave. :D Today, Baby Bear was driving me crazy with her lack of focus.

“If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.”

-- Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne

Feeling like I do right now, I could hibernate for six months… except my body would ache after laying there for that long.

“It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like "What about lunch?"

Winnie the Pooh Pooh's Little Instruction Book

I often catch myself eating stupid. Not today. I can’t eat much without feeling very uncomfortable. With all my food allergies I find myself eating more fish, nuts, and berries. Thankfully, I haven’t had the pleasure (tongue in cheek) of tasting bugs and grubs. EWWW!

I could have used my kids being born the size of walnuts. I developed PIH (pregnancy induced hypertension) with each one of my kids. I got so sick at the end of pregnancy it’s a miracle that I had 5 kids!

I’m a ferocious defender of family and friends. I don’t think I’ve swatted anyone recently… but I’ve thought about it. I’d sure like to kick these health issues to the curb!

And shaving what’s that? LOL! I don’t grow hair. I have very little on my arms and legs and rarely “have” to shave. I do, however, wake up with bed head and the GROWL!


“A bear, however hard he tries, grows tubby without exercise.”

-- Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne

Body fat? I have that in spades. However, I’m planning huge sale on it soon. Everything must go!

… definitely a bear sometimes....

1 comment:

  1. Is it possible for me to "like" your comments here without offending my wife?