Skip to main content

Gospel Study - Where Is the Pavilion?

It's been a tough couple of days... very little sleep, sick kids, and a show to open all in one weekend.  I love what I do, but I have to admit it is all exhausting.

Today I read President Henry B. Eyring's talk, Where Is the Pavilion?

Great talk!

I have felt this feeling of abandonment... wondering where is God and where are the answers to my prayers and the desires of my heart.   Although I feel the darkness closing in, I know that "God is never hidden..."

I learned something from this thought:

"... sometimes we are, covered by a pavilion of motivations that draw us away from God and make Him seem distant and inaccessible,  Our own desires, rather than a feeling of'Thy will be done.' create the feeling of a pavilion blocking God."

It figures.  It is my own fault.  I know that I often get it into my head that I know better.  silly.

My biggest problem is that I fall into the trap of insisting on my own time table!

Take all the things I pray for:  better health... smaller body... my son's heart softened... my darkest thoughts gone and a complete feeling of security and trust.  But they don't seem to come.  I want them NOW.  But it is not time... I guess.  I did have to fast and pray every Sunday for over 2 years for Lillian to bless our family.

Somethings I want so badly that I forget God works on His time.  I get caught up in thinking that I am not good at prayer, that I am praying for the wrong thing, and sometimes I don't pray at all.... because the answer it taking so long.

"The Lord's delays often seem long; some last a lifetime.  But they are always calculated to bless."

I might not ever get to be thin, or healthy, or be able to get out of a car or bed without pain.  I may never see my son return to the gospel of Jesus Christ. I may never feel safe in my relationships.  At least in this life.

I just have to accept that and embrace that.

I can do that.


Popular posts from this blog

Book of Mormon Study... Title page and testimony of the witnesses

According to the Prophet Joseph Smith, “the title-page of the Book of Mormon is a literal translation, taken from the very last leaf, on the left hand side of the collection or book of plates, which contained the record which has been translated, the language of the whole running the same as all Hebrew writing in general; and that said title page is not by any means a modern composition, either of mine or of any other man who has lived or does live in this generation” (History of the Church, 1:71).

That means it’s scripture too! That is why today I start my Book of Mormon study with the title page.

I am part of the House of Israel. My children and their children are a part of the House of Israel. This Book is written for me and for them.

I love that the Title page declares that this book is a “gift”… now this book I am marking will become a “gift” for my grandson. How cool is that? I feel like Nephi, writing my testimony of Jesus Christ and of the gospel plan as I study God’s word so …

An Open Letter to Those Who Hate The School Dress Code

I have noticed a ton of resistance to dress codes in schools.  I have something to say... get over it.  
A dress code is not about body shaming.  It is not about control.  It's not about taking away individuality. The dress code is not about making social divisions.  It is not about taking away individual rights.
A dress code is about keeping a professional environment where real work happens.  Contrary to popular belief, woman don't get to wear whatever they want when ever they want in "the real world." Every profession has some kind of dress code.  Nurses, doctors, real estate brokers, vets, and even McDonald's workers have a dress code.  Even farmers and day labors wear clothing appropriate to the work they do.  School is a professional environment where the student's "job" is to be the student - to learn - and the teachers' job is to open the possibilities in young minds and to create an environment where people - all people - can learn.  Th…

Once-a-Slightly Over Month Cooking

Today may be the last day of the year, but it was the first day of the month around the Boyack house.  Today was Once-a-Month-Cooking day.  The funny thing is that it usually ends up lasting longer than a month.  Our last big cooking day lasted from September to now.  The thing is, I don't always pull from the freezer.  Weekend we cook from scratch.  However, with my voice lessons in late afternoons and sometimes play practice or performance I am too tired to think about dinner.  Making dinner ahead saved me so much money from September to Christmas that I was able to pay for half of Christmas from the savings from the food budget.  Plus, we had much healthier meals!

After collecting which recipes we wanted to make, and making a shopping list, John headed to the store around noon.  We started the cooking and assembly around 1:00 and ended all the cooking by 7:00.  In that time we made 35 dinners.  We have the fix-in's in the cupboard to make 15 more quick and easy meals.  We …